Welcome
Welcome to this month's edition of People Matter, produced by CustomerClix.
Notable days in February include Valentine's Day (Tue 14th Feb 2012) and Mon 27th Feb 2012 is 'Time for a Cuppa'. This is an initiative by Dementia UK to encourage people to organise a tea party at home or in the community to help raise funds for those affected by Dementia.
Remember that if we can help you or your organisation with your own or others' personal development, then do get in touch. We really do want to help you.
Warmest wishes
Kim Crosby
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Unleash the Power of Three
Try this technique to jump-start your next speech
Would you like to quickly develop a speech that is easy to deliver and easy for your audience to listen to and remember? The ‘Power of Three’ can help you achieve this goal.
The Power of Three is a rhetorical device used to make a message memorable. You do this by using three sounds, words or phrases in an established 1-2-3 pattern. In the case of sounds, this device might enhance a phrase with the use of a triple alliteration, as in the US political slogan ‘Tippecanoe and Tyler too’.
But why limit the Power of Three to a rhetorical device? The use of threes is a highly beneficial strategy for structuring speeches, as well.
A speech should have three sections: An introduction, a body and a conclusion. We are often taught to ‘Tell them what you are going to tell them, tell them and then tell them what you told them’. While experienced speakers often try to make their speech structures more dynamic, that basic pattern - a simplified use of the introduction-through-conclusion design – is a good overture to the Power of Threes. Try some of the following ideas to add a powerful three part structure to your next speech.
Your message: Crafted, clear and cogent
Can you describe your speech in one sentence? If not, you probably are not ready to present it. If you can, then you should be able to build everything from the title down to the conclusion in a simple recipe for success.
First, you can derive your title from the summary sentence. It’s a good habit to prepare an introduction for the Toastmaster (Master of Ceremonies) to read about you and / or the subject of your speech; the last line in that introduction should be your title statement – a sentence that includes your speech title. For example, ‘Today Justin will be speaking on The Joy of Reading’.
At some point between your introduction and your body of the presentation, you should make clear that the title rings true with the rest of the speech. A simple way is to say so. This is often referred to as a ‘Specific Purpose Statement (SPS)’. In a fundamental speech structure, an SPS helps the audience know where you are going, for example, ‘I love reading, and you can too’.
Next comes the body, where you talk about your three points.
Shape the body by threes
Do you want to ensure that your talk will fit the time requirement precisely? Try this: Limit your body to a maximum of three points. If you want your speech to be remembered, give them three points. Limiting yourself to three points also helps with memorising speeches – less to remember.
If you find that you have more than three, try to condense and combine similar points. Remember, your audience will be ok if you don’t tell them everything you know about your subject.
Keep it clear
After the body and before the conclusion, repeat the SPS. You can do this in a way that keeps it clear and interesting and leads to a call for action or a suggestion for future thought, such as: ‘Now you know why I love reading, what are you going to read today?’ Which is a great way to conclude your speech... and you’re done.
It’s fun-damental
Is the Power of Three the only structure you can use? Is it a panacea for all your speech preparation problems? Is it the Holy Grail of speaking approaches? No, but if you are new to speaking, or need to jump-start a speech, this offers something to try. If you have a SPS and three points, you’re more than halfway to the finish line.
Try using the Power of Three to structure your next speech. Doing so should make it easier to prepare, easier to deliver – and most importantly – easier for your audience to hear, enjoy and remember.
Unleash the Power of Three, p11, Toastmaster magazine, Apr 2011, Toastmasters International
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Freedom With a Little Help from Henry Higgins
There are two facts about human behavior that you can pretty much take to the bank. One is that once individuals obtain adulthood, they tend to do in the future what they have done in the past. The other is that people love freedom.
We can put these two facts about our behavior together into one statement: We love freedom but we hardly ever exercise it; or put even more succinctly, we are creatures of habit who think we aren’t.
In 1890 William James described habit as “the enormous flywheel of society, its most precious conservative agent,” in his chapter on habit in Principles of Psychology. Twenty-three years later Bernard Shaw’s Pygmalion appeared on stage with Henry Higgins in Act I, repeating James’ observation of how habit keeps people in their places. “You see this creature with her kerbstone English: the English that will keep her in the gutter to the end of her days. Well, sir, in three months I could pass that girl off as a duchess at an ambassador's garden party.” He proceeds over the next 4 acts to do just that.
But the change was enormously painful for Eliza Doolittle. As with all important changes she ended up changing more in her life than her speech.
I’ve learned over an adult lifetime as a psychologist, attempting to help others change, as well as myself as a human being, that we all want to change the outcomes in our lives without having to change our behaviors, attitudes or thoughts. We ask professionals, self-help books, friends, magazine articles for an answer that can only be given with magic. How do I keep doing mostly the same things and have things turn out differently? We want to travel the same roads but reach different destinations.
Habits are means, not ends. They are our roads comfortably taken. This tells us that if we are going to exercise our freedom to change, without changing our surroundings and our friends, we must concentrate on habits.
Habits are harder to find than it would seem. This is because they are performed without thought and little effort, which is why they are comfortable. For a baseball pitcher, throwing the ball high is not a habit. It is the outcome of a habit; for example releasing the ball too soon. For a chocolate lover, eating chocolate isn’t a habit. It is the outcome of going where chocolate is sold, down comfortable isles with habitual thoughts and feelings that go with those surroundings.
In general changing outcomes in our lives that we dislike requires us to first back up and examine the habitual behaviours that occur, unnoticed by us, before the outcomes occur. This is where good coaches, teachers, and counsellors come in.
A master piano teacher can show you how to make your fast phrases become faster, while maintaining the distinctiveness of all the notes, by slowing down and practicing them very, very slowly with all your strength exerted on each individual note. What was done without thought as a habit, is taken apart and deliberately changed until it becomes a new habit leading you where you want to go.
Good counsellors can help you find the habitual roads that lead to arguments with your spouse and how to establish different habits that lead to communication. They can help you slow down and review your actual words and point out your use of “you always” and “you never,” phrases you aren’t even aware of using. You can practice slowly and thoughtfully words that communicate your feelings and point of view instead of words, automatically said out of habit, that register attacks.
“You never care about what I have to say” goes to an entirely different destination in an evening together with your spouse than “I felt alone when we were shopping.” However it often takes two to work on changing habits that lead to fighting, into habits that help communication. Just as members of a team or a musical ensemble must practice individually to get rid of their own bad habits in order for the goals of the team to be met, couples require individual practice.
Wanting to do the same things and have them turn out differently isn’t insane, as someone once said. Rather it is insanely normal. We can do better than normal if we exercise our freedom to change with a little help from a Henry Higgins.
Written by Carl Semmelroth, PhD, Clinical Psychologist and author of The Anger Habit series of books including the highly recommended The Anger Habit: Proven Principles to Calm the Stormy Mind.
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Poet’s Corner: The months
Those of you that have attended our public speaking training sessions know the importance of working with words to craft compelling speeches. So, each month, we feature a topical poem or passage that illustrates this point, using lyrical English.
This month features a poem that describes beautifully and succinctly the months of the year. Enjoy...
January cold and desolate;
February dripping wet;
March wind ranges;
April changes;
Birds sing in tune
To flowers of May,
And sunny June
Brings longest day;
In scorched July
The storm-clouds fly,
Lightning-torn;
August bears corn,
September fruit;
In rough October
Earth must disrobe her;
Stars fall and shoot
In keen November;
And night is long
And cold is strong
In bleak December."
The months, Christina Rossetti (1830-1894), English poet
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Quotations
Be not afraid, the isle is full of noises, Sounds and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not, from The Tempest, William Shakespeare (1564-1616), English dramatist & poet (quote to be used in the London Olympics & Paralympic Games, 2012)
I'd rather be hated for who I am, rather than loved for who I'm not, Kurt Cobain (1967-1994), American singer-songwriter, musician and artist, lead singer & guitarist with Nirvana
I saw an ad in a shop window that said “Television for Sale – £1- Volume Stuck On Full”. I thought: “I can’t turn that down”, Tommy Cooper (1921-1984), British comedian
Freedom lies in being bold, Robert Lee Frost (1874-1963), American poet
Work and love, Sigmund Freud (1856-1939), Austrian neurologist and founder of the psychoanalytic school of psychology
Women are a complete mystery, Professor Stephen Hawking (1942- ), British theoretical physicist and cosmologist, reveals the one thing in the universe that still baffles him
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And if your birthday is in February...
Birthstone: Amethyst
The February born will find
Sincerity and peace of mind
Freedom from passion and from care
If they the amethyst will wear
Anon
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Volunteering: Dementia UK
Many people do much for worthy causes. Thus, every month, we feature an organisation that requires volunteers and / or other forms of help to support its work.
If the organisation featured this month is of interest but is not local to you, perhaps you could contact a similar organisation near you to volunteer your help?
Dementia UK / Time for a Cuppa (Mon 27th Feb 2012)
Dementia UK is a charity that is committed to improving the quality of life for all people affected by dementia.
The charity has four core areas:
Admiral Nurses are specialist mental health nurses that work within the National Health Service (NHS) in the United Kingdom (UK) and are supported by Dementia UK. Admiral Nurses provide practical and emotional support to family carers of people with dementia.
Admiral Nursing DIRECT is a telephone (0845 257 9406) and email helpline, provided by experienced Admiral Nurses.
Dementia UK Training specialises in the provision of high quality training courses for those that work with older people and people with dementia.
Uniting Carers is a national network of carers, former carers, family and friends of people affected by dementia.
Monday 27th February 2012 is Time for a Cuppa. This is an initiative that encourages people to organise a tea party at home or in the community to help raise funds for those affected by Dementia.
Follow Dementia UK's work on Twitter or Facebook.
Or click here to view voluntary positions or here to view paid positions at the charity, or click here to donate.
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Forthcoming get togethers
Would you like to mingle and have fun? If the answer to this question is yes, do come along to the following events. But let us know beforehand that you're attending so that we can rendezvous with you. And please extend the invite to others - the more the merrier!
Wed 15th Feb 2012 - 19:00-20:00 hours - Lecture: Heart to Heart - £10 per person - Royal Institution of Great Britain, 21 Albemarle Street, London, W1S 4BS, United Kingdom
Thu 23rd Feb 2012 - 19:00-20:00 hours - Lecture: Does innovation begin with the entrepreneur or the technology? - £10 per person - Royal Institution of Great Britain, 21 Albemarle Street, London, W1S 4BS, United Kingdom
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